Girl Crush

In my three months as a gym buff (yes, I make such a claim!), I have yet to see a real cutie. Actually, I’ve been forewarned not to consider any one I meet at the gym because chances are he’s gay. And who wants to meet anyone at the gym, anyway? It’s not like you can be your cutest self in that atmosphere. I myself go to the gym in my snug dri fit shirts which completely obliterate my chances of looking cute; I wash off my make-up/face powder before my workout; and my hair is always tied in a ponytail. So contrary to the rumor going around that the gym is the best place to meet someone, gym and making a good first impression don’t really go together.

Except for maybe a few lucky ones.

Which brings me back to my earlier point.

While I haven’t met any eligible guy worth crushing on, I’ve seen a couple of girls I’d exchange physical attributes with in a heartbeat. There’s this girl, for instance, who looks older than me but who moves so flawlessly in the group exercises that I just have to stop and watch her every time. She jumps and she glides and she lunges and she stretches, and I’m like, whoa, that’s who I wanna be when I’m forty! And she has this calm and fresh look when she’s not working out which she transforms into this fierce and athletic look when she’s lifting weights. And the thing is, she’s not really pretty. She’s just fit. Well, fit and mestiza, that is. With all the lean muscles at the right places.

And then there’s this girl who looks perfect in every way— the type one loves to hate in high school because she gets the cutest guy during soirees, and who wears all these cute dri- fit shirts that I’ve seen in Nike but couldn’t buy because they never come in my size. I try to figure out every time I see her how come her pony tail is always in place even after she does all those abs exercises lying down. Anyway, since she’s little miss perfect physically, I go on automatic intellectual snob mode every time I see her.  I tell myself, I bet she’s dumb and she’s counting on her seaman boyfriend who happens to be married to pay for her gym fees. Because why else would she be able to work out during office hours if she’s working, right? It’s not as if she looks like someone who can afford flexible working hours. But then I overheard her one day talking to her gym buddy about leaving the country to pursue further studies in oncology, no less. She’s a doctor, as it happens. Of a leading hospital, at that. So much for being an intellectual snob.

I am a certified girl, but I have to admit, there are girls that make me take a second look whenever I see them. In college, I had a girl crush named Amie who looked like Winona Ryder. In law school, I admired this girl named Franchette who graduated on top of her class. I grew up wanting to be like Bea Lucero and Akiko Thompson. And just recently, my friend pointed out to me that I’ve been obsessing about Ainsley’s character on The West Wing.

So while my motivation for losing weight includes seeing that look on his face when he sees me 40lbs later, my other motivation has to do with wanting to be girl crush number one. I know it’s too late to aspire to be an athlete, but it’s never too late to look like one. And from now on, I have her as my peg.

Having a boy crush is fun and kilig, but having a girl crush— that’s something else.


About whathappensinbetween

It took me almost an hour to figure out what to write here so I guess that says a lot about me.
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